


Unspoken

by darkroses



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Abuse, Alpha Castiel (Supernatural), Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Blindness, Castration, Dark, Muteness, Non-Consensual Body Modification, Objectification, Omega Sam, Rape, Rape/Non-con Elements
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-18
Updated: 2017-09-18
Packaged: 2018-12-31 01:51:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12121938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darkroses/pseuds/darkroses
Summary: Gods unspoken words were clear to Sam. He was unloved, yet not hated. Heaven and peace would always be just outside of his grasp.Perhaps someday, Sam could speak his unspoken words.





	Unspoken

Sam stared out the car window wordlessly. He really had nothing left to say. The trees and houses zipped by the window. The car was taking him to someplace different. Someplace where he would likely never see his family again. Sam wasn’t sure how he felt about that.

Distantly Sam heard his father speak, “Just try to make the best of it, Sammy.”

 _I won’t. I won’t ever._ Were the unspoken thoughts running through Sam’s head. Some words were never meant to be spoken.

“I love you. I am only doing this because I love you.” The words from his father sounded earnest enough, but not enough at the same time.

Love was something Sam was certain he had never felt. He sometimes pondered what love was and what love was not. This was not an act of love, nor an act of malice. It was something in between that Sam didn’t quite have the words for. Sam’s response to his father remained unspoken.

This wasn't loved.

++

The car stopped in front of a house. Not large nor small. Not fancy nor in disrepair. It looked like one of the thousands of homes scattered across the lands. Nothing remarkable about the home. Nothing perfect about the home. Perhaps there was an emptiness inside the home. Unspoken whispers likely surrounded this home, as they did all homes. As Sam stared at the home, his home, he wondered what would remain unspoken here.

The alpha that lived in the home looked strict yet tired. The years may have kept him handsome, but the years did not treat him well. However, the world rarely treated anyone well. The years showed in the man’s unkempt hair. It was short but an unruly dark mess on top his head. The man’s eyes were a brilliant shade of blue. Sam was certain in this man’s youth, they sparkled with innocence. Now, although the color remained there was coldness around the edges. It spoke of many things that would likely remain unspoken.

The alpha’s features or life didn’t really matter though. Sam turned his eyes to his bare feet and curled his toes on the cool concrete of the front porch. The simple action mesmerized Sam for a moment before the alpha’s voice cut through, “I don’t want him dressed when he enters my home.”

From the ground, Sam could see his father’s boots turn to him. It looked menacing from his view, but Sam knew what his father wanted without the words needing to be said. He carefully removed his shirt, pants, and boxers. He handed the clothing to his father as he stood naked on a stranger’s front porch. Neither the alpha nor his father thanked him for removing his clothing. Any thanks they had remained unspoken.

The alpha took Sam by the hand and led him into the home. The carpet was soft under Sam’s feet and it didn’t hurt when the alpha pushed him to his knees in front of him. A gentle hand ran through Sam’s hair and Sam felt his eyes flutter shut. The alpha’s voice could be heard again, “I trust you got your funds for the omega?”

“Yes, I did. Will you honor my one request?” There were few times in Sam’s life when his father sounded nervous. This was one of them. Sam didn’t know what the request was, nor did he want to ask. A lot of things were unspoken around him.

The alpha replied shortly, “It depends on his behavior, but I will do my best.”

Sam heard his father leave, but he never saw him go. Perhaps, goodbye was unspoken because this wasn’t truly goodbye. Somehow, Sam doubted that. Sometimes, words of relief when a burden was finally out of one’s life remained unspoken. Sam knew he was a burden to his father, but the extent of his burden always remained unspoken.

__

Sam wasn’t sure how long the alpha left him kneeling naked on the carpet but it was long enough for his knees to start to ache. The alpha sat down in front of him and took out his cock from his pants. The alpha stroked it slowly in front of Sam’s face. Once he was fully hard, he guided Sam’s face over to it. The unspoken command to perform oral sex was given, so Sam performed.

He had never done this before so it was unpracticed and sloppy. He was nervous and scared which caused his body to shake as he did it. Tears leaked from his eyes but he was not sure if it was from choking or because he didn’t want this. His desire to stop remained an unspoken thought. Only the shakes, gentle sobs, and tears told of what was left unspoken.

But unspoken words sometimes go unnoticed or were disregarded, whatever the case, Sam felt his alpha orgasm in his mouth. Sam did his best to swallow, but some trailed out down his chin, his body and finally to the floor. He stopped himself from gagging, but he couldn’t stop himself from the revulsion he felt inside.

Sam watched as the alpha tucked himself back inside his pants. The alpha ran a hand through his hair again and said calmly, “Good omega, I am sure you would like to know the rules. Some you already know. I will cover the basics for now. You will never wear clothes again. You will never speak again. You will never look at anyone again. You will never get an erection again. You are mine.”

__

How any of the rules would be obeyed remained a mystery to Sam until Sam found himself strapped to the table at the omega clinic. A metallic spray was already put down his throat. Then the doctor burned something inside his throat. It hurt and tears leaked from Sam’s eyes. He watched as the doctor removed his balls. He saw the smug look on the doctor’s face and one of concern on his alpha’s face. No one spoke of his violation. Any thoughts regarding his comfort remained unspoken.

The last thing he ever saw was the doctor lean over him with eye drops. Once the dropped hit his eyes, it burned. Everything went red before it started to fade into nothingness. Sam tried to scream and beg his alpha for help, but his couldn’t. His voice was taken from him.

All of his words, all of his thoughts would forever remain unspoken. Sam didn’t know how to make the best of that.

__

Somehow, it was better not to see his body ravaged by childbirth. It was better not to see the stares of strangers as they looked at his naked body. It was better not to hear his own screams as it felt like each birth would rip him in two. It was better not to hear his own screams for this all to stop each time the alpha had sex with him. It was better to have never felt an orgasm with this alpha because it was one thing that could never be taken from him. It was true that he would never feel sexual pleasure again, but the memories he did have of pleasure were good.

In his memories, no one forced him. He was alone, but it was his own will. It was his own pleasure. He remembered what it felt like to moan. He remembered what he looked like down there and he even remembered his face when he climaxed thanks to looking in the mirror. This alpha couldn’t take away those memories. He couldn’t taint or twist his memories of pleasure.

Sam made sure that the fruits of his alpha’s pleasure hurt the alpha. Sam never once held any of the children he birthed. He rejected all of them. A nanny cared for them and sometimes, late at night, Sam could hear his alpha pleasuring her. It never filled Sam with jealousy from his spot on the floor where he slept each night.

Her moans were unspoken words for Sam. Unspoken words telling Sam that tonight he could rest without abuse. Tonight, he could wrap a towel from the laundry around himself and sleep in warmth. Her moans brought Sam unspoken happiness and perhaps, her moans helped him make the best of it.  

He gave her unspoken thanks, each night. He sent unspoken prayers to God each night begging for death. Sam wanted to die so he could see again. He wanted to die so he could speak again. He wanted God to let him die so he would know at least God loved him. 

But his prayers were unspoken and never answered. Gods unspoken words were clear to Sam. He was unloved, yet not hated. Heaven and peace would always be just outside of his grasp. 

Perhaps someday, Sam could speak his unspoken words. Perhaps someday, he could. Sam ran his hand along the carpet and felt a crayon on the floor. He didn't know the color or if it would work. 

Sam sat and covered the wall with his unspoken thoughts. 

_Please stop raping me._

_I am cold._

_I want to die._

_You're hurting me._

_I am a person._

_I have feelings._

_I cannot do this anymore._

Sam wasn't sure if his unspoken words would be read, but at least he wrote what was unspoken. He sobbed that night with his back against the wall. For once, he wished he could hear his own sobs. 


End file.
